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Bikini Bottom Jewelry Is Here, and It's Terrifying
Because the list of ridiculous things that have been invented in 2017 couldn't get any longer, we're here to present a bikini crotch charm called the "Beachtail."
It's a metal chain-like thing with dangly teardrop-shaped crystals that clips onto your bikini bottoms. The charms are available in many colors, and some are made with Swarovski crystals. All are made with questionable metals that have zero other options than to touch your lady bits.
It feels a bit like those massive 2000s dangly belly button rings, except for the lady-part touching thing.
If you're heading to Señor Frog's for spring break 2004, this $20 crotch charm is definitely for you.